I miss you all the time.

I can feel myself growing fonder.  Remembering your nervous laugh, your stories, I used to think you were the cutest. But now that I’ve seen you in your home, comfortable, tired, yet smiling all the same without your glasses, I like to think I’ve seen a different side of you, and I can’t help but think of you differently.  How easy it is to mistake your smiling gaze for love when we’re lying next to each other, skin to skin. But to you, I am merely a notch in your bedpost, and I’ve told myself that I’m okay with that.

…I can do this.

As soon as I get serious, it’ll all be over. Simple enough.  I just need to make sure these feelings don’t develop any further. It’s only lust after all. And you’ve made it clear that I could never have you.  You can’t have me either. And that girl you love in the city will have the happiest ending I won’t even dare to hope for.

This too shall pass.  So why not enjoy it while it lasts…